Caring for the Caregiver: You Can’t Pour from an Empty Cup
By Stephanie Portnall
Let’s talk about caregiving.
It’s one of the hardest, most selfless jobs there is. If you’re a caregiver, first of all, let me say this: you are incredible. Seriously. But let’s be real for a second—when’s the last time you felt cared for?
It wouldn’t be right for me to talk about supporting others without also reminding you to take care of yourself. I know it sounds cliché, but trust me, you cannot pour from an empty cup. And I get it—you're probably rolling your eyes like, “Yeah, yeah, easier said than done.” But I’m being serious here: you can’t be at your best for someone else if you’re constantly running on fumes.
Let’s Start with the Basics: Your Health
I’m not kidding—when was the last time you ate a real meal, not just cold coffee and leftover crackers? I know caregiving often feels like a 24/7 job, but your body doesn’t run on gratitude alone. You’ve got to fuel it. Try keeping a stash of quick, healthy snacks on hand (things like nuts, fruit, or protein bars). And don’t forget to hydrate—water is your best friend, even if you think caffeine is.
Also, let’s talk sleep. I know caregiving schedules can be wild, but even sneaking in a power nap can make a huge difference. Trust me, your brain will thank you.
Emotional Burnout is Real—Don’t Ignore It
Look, I know you’re tough. But caregiving is emotionally draining, and it’s okay to admit that. It’s more than okay, actually—it’s necessary. You’ve got to find a way to unload some of the mental weight you’re carrying.
Call a friend who gets it. Join an online caregiver support group (seriously, you can Google it right now—there are so many out there). Or just grab a notebook and dump your thoughts onto paper. You’d be surprised how much better you feel after getting it all out.
And hey, don’t be afraid to laugh. Even if it feels like life is throwing a million curveballs, finding little moments of joy can be a game-changer. Watch a silly movie, scroll through dog memes—whatever works.
Set Boundaries Like a Boss
This one’s tough, I know. But listen, you can’t do it all. Repeat after me: “It’s okay to say no.” Whether it’s turning down an extra favor or asking another family member to step in, setting boundaries doesn’t make you selfish—it makes you smart.
Here’s a trick: write down your top priorities. What must get done today versus what can wait? That way, you can focus on what really matters instead of trying to tackle everything at once.
Let People Help (No, Really)
If you’re anything like me, asking for help might feel...awkward. Or maybe you’ve convinced yourself that no one else can do it “right.” But trust me, you want to let people help. Whether it’s a friend bringing over dinner, someone offering to sit with your loved one for an hour, or a neighbor running errands for you—take them up on it. People genuinely want to support you, but they don’t always know how. Sometimes, you just have to tell them what you need.
Celebrate the Little Wins
This is important: don’t wait for some huge milestone to pat yourself on the back. Did you get through today without completely losing it? Amazing. Did you remember to drink water, or take a five-minute walk? That’s a win.
Caregiving is made up of a million little victories, and they all matter. So go ahead—celebrate them.
You’re doing a hard thing, and you’re doing it with so much love. If no one’s told you lately, I see you. And if you need someone to remind you to put yourself first every now and then, consider this it.
